Very Various (Day 16)

• I’m a dreamer.
• Garlic does bad things to me.
• Today, I sanded wood planks.
• I have new boots.
• Last week, I wrote the next greatest children’s story.  Just thought you should know.
• Brad is asleep.
• Today, we lost and found our white kitty
• All is well tonight and I will keep on dreaming.

 

days like today (Various 13)

On days like today I usually hold things in.

 

 

tummy tum-tum

If I could

I sure would

Shove theses yummy yum-yums

In my tummy tum-tum

• hummus
• avocados
• cheddar cheese
• coconut cream pie
• walnuts
• 1/2 of a chili dog (i mean i gotta watch my figure)
• peanut M&M’s
• Pringles
• a cinnamon roll
• mashed potatoes w/ white gravy
• …and some of Minny’s fried chicken.

And remember — Tums® are your friend.

 

 

sweety-swammy (Various Day 10)

My inspirational reading today comes from The Bumper Book and is brought to you by the letter “J”.

was once a jar of jam,
Jammy
Mammy
Clammy
Jammy
Sweety, swammy, Jar of jam!

 

hairy legs (Various Day 9)

This morning, as I was shaving my legs, I remembered that summer when I went with Nanny to stay for a while at Aunt Renna and Uncle Bill’s house in Bartlesville.  Papa had died the previous December and we went to stay with them for a week or so.  It was a wonderful time for me, being able to get away with Nanny and I adored Aunt Renna so much.  Being with the sisters was thrilling to me.  We played games and talked and ate junk food and did whatever we wanted.  It was marvelous.

One evening Nanny was in the living room watching TV.  I will never forget it — she was wearing blue pajamas and her slippers.  I sat down at her feet while she was watching television and began rubbing her legs with some Vaseline Intensive Care Hand Lotion that was sitting beside the chair.  All of a sudden I noticed that she had the hairiest legs EVER!  I was mortified and said to her:  “Nanny, don’t you shave your legs?!”  She just laughed and said that when you’re her age you don’t need to shave your legs anymore because your hairs don’t grow as much as when your a young woman and that she couldn’t even see her leg hairs.  So, I asked her if I could pluck her hairy legs with some tweezers.  (I know, I’m sick.)  She laughed and said, “Sure.”   So, I did.  I plucked a patch of her hairy legs and she didn’t even flinch.  Not once.

I guess when you get old, in addition to not being able to see your legs, you can’t feel them either.   Weird, huh.

I miss her more than anything.  AND I freakin’ can’t wait ’til I don’t have to shave my legs cause I can’t see how hairy they are.

 

gummy bears for Buck (Various Day 6)

Earlier this evening Isaiah walked into the kitchen, looked at Brad and said:

“Papa, I got no pizza.”

Brad gulped hard, looked at Isaiah and said:  “Well buddy, I got no pizza either.”  Then he took him to the store and bought him gummy bears instead.  Papa is super!

(And yes, I know I forgot Various Day 5.  Don’t be a hater — be a lover.)

 

…some days are like (Various Day 4)

Some days are diamonds.  Some days are cubic zirconia.

…or something like that.

 

Tendencies (Various Day 3)

When one only lives with men, she tends to close her door more.

 

you and me (Various Day 2)

If I were you
and you were me
we
would
just
be
happy to be.

 

Little Round Green Thing

I wonder if you like little round green things

as much as me.

If you do

I would be O so very happy.

We could eat them together while we

sing and laugh and play and dance

sitting around

both of us in our comfy pants. ©

~Jayme Martin